After a bit of a lay in and a breakfast of egg and tomato rolls we started packing up. I was looking at the map tossing up wether to stick to the more direct A3054 across the Isle to Yarmouth, or wether we’d be better off taking to the B roads for a more meandering run, when a young bloke who must have arrived during the night with a huge tent asked if we needed directions. He said the A road was quite a good cycle, not to busy or hilly, so we thanked him for the advice and set off for Yarmouth.
A pleasant ten miles or so later we found ourselves dropping into Yarmouth, blue skies and blue seas with various

yachts bobbing around made a for a nice view, we quickly found the ferry terminal, and chatted to another cyclist waiting to cross.
The skies were definitely darkening now though, and as we boarded the ferry it was starting to spit. We found the lounge and bar, took the opportunity for a pint of ale and settled into our seats for the crossing. It took considerably longer than the Seacat to Ryde, and the weather had definitely caught up with us. Our poor bikes stuck out on the deck would certainly be getting wet, and our friendly cyclist suggested we bolt for the ‘Wagon and Horses’ pub when we docked in Lymington. Never ones to ignore local advice we did just that, managed to get our bikes under cover as it started lashing down and decided to stay put for some lunch.
We gave Mike and Michelle a call to see if they’d made it into the new forest and they informed us that they’d been driving round having difficulty finding a camp site that wasn’t either full or flooded. I hadn’t considered the possibility that it would be difficult to find a camp site in such a popular national park, but apparently that was going to be the case.
The rain eased and we decided to make a bolt for Brockenhurst, but we hadn’t got far before it came back with avengence. So heavy that it was difficult to see, the sides of the roads flooded to the point where the only tarmac that wasn’t submerged was a couple of feet in the middle. Cars wooshed past splashing us with their wakes and I began to think about stopping at the next B&B.
Just then a car pulled in front of us and it was Mike and Michelle, they were fairly amused at our bedraggled appearance, and I don’t think Michelle could quite believe what I was putting Kez through. They arranged to meet us in Brockenhurst and before long we were sitting in a packed bar, full of other refugees from the weather. Motorcyclists
sat in their creaking colourful leathers, grimly dripping on the wooden floor, kids on holiday played pool and through the window we watched a bike hire company hosing off dozens of muddied mountain bikes that had been returned early.
I managed to get a dry pair of boxers out of a pannier and changed in the toilet, which made things a bit more comfortable.
Mike and Michelle showed up soon after, with the news that they’d found a site called Decoy Pond Farm that would take us, about eight miles up the road. The rain had stopped again so we bought a load of booze and meaty supplies for Mike’s disposable barbecues, waved them off, crossed our fingers for the rain to hold off and followed. It didn’t take long for us to reach the site, thankfully without having to suffer any more deluges and I was genuinely excited to find out Mike and Michelle had brought 4 camping chairs with them!
Mike had pitched his £15 bargain ebay tent and was gamely trying to inflate his double air bed, however after every few pumps something gave way and the air kept escaping.
pffff pfffff.. POP!FFWEEEeeeeee.
pffff pffff pffff pffffff.. POP!FFWEEEeeeeee.
pffff pffff pffffff.. POP!FFWEEeeeeee.
Eventually another camper approached and offered a battery powered pump, but Mike was determined to do his own pumping, the way real men do it, by hand, and sent the good samaritan away, looking slightly confused. All of this was wonderful light relief after a bit of a taxing afternoon, and we all settled into our camp chairs with tins of Wadworths and Tetleys and a barbecue smouldering happily as the sky cleared to give us a few minutes of warm sun before it set over the horizon.
I managed to upend the barbecue just as the finest pork chops were ready, dumping the whole thing upside down on the grass, which was a bit upsetting, but muddy, sooty meat is ok if you stick Wetherspoons mustard on it.
We were all slightly perturbed when a bunch of fellow campers started swinging an axe about, whacking lumps of wood, but it was ok, they were just making a bonfire, an activity apparently allowed on this site. In fact once it was going they did invite us over to sit round it, but we were too busy cooking the last of the sausages, and frankly they were a bit scary.
Midges danced happily on the thermals from our insect deterrent citronella candle, Michelle got happy on vodka and played with a glow stick, we all enjoyed furiously masturbating Mike’s shake-powered torch (ebay bargain), and eventually we boozily zipped into our tents blissfully unaware that the harmless little midges had been feasting violently on every millimeter of exposed flesh amongst us.